I started Finally Felix back in 2013.
Looking back through my old posts, I’m amazed at how much has changed over the years. How much I’ve changed.
The journey from 2013 to now has taken me to depths so dark and lonely, I don’t know how I was able to climb out. At the same time, I’ve experienced levels of joy that I didn’t even know were possible. And surprisingly, I’ve discovered new parts of myself that were sometimes great…and sometimes made me cringe. Despite that, I’ve enjoyed getting to know this complex woman developing in the mirror before my eyes.
And yes, I’m in divorce talks with my husband, I’m moving into my own place in a few weeks, and I’ve finally traveled beyond the fear that held me hostage most of my life … but I’m still not at the end of this. I’ve got children to mange through this transition, a frustrated soon-to-be ex, and a huge life change that is looming before me like a giant wave … but dammit, this space feels so fucking amazing!
If you are coming to this blog early in your own journey, please don’t be deterred by what can sometimes feel like an unattainable goal. Because, there were absolutely times when I felt like there was no end to this. Moments of guilt, pain and doubt that left me broken … do you hear me? BROKEN! But please know that even if it feels like you’re standing still … you ARE still moving. Shifting your whole life takes time; be kind to yourself, give yourself permission to mourn what you’re leaving behind and to celebrate what lies ahead. And whatever you do, do not stop moving … even if it feels like you’re only creeping along by centimeters, it’s still movement, it’s still getting you closer to where you need to be … don’t ever stop.